Lily – 1 Month Old

June 8, 2021

Lily is one month old today, hurray! We have had the pleasure to get to know this tiny human for a whole month already. I still can’t really believe I am someones parent. And it’s also hard to believe that I was pregnant for 9 months before this. That huge bump seems to only exist on pictures cause I don’t really remember it, hahah.
I honestly didn’t expect it to be this easy to have a baby. Sure, we’ve had tougher moments here and there but overall it’s way easier than I thought. Part why it feels easier could maybe be that Lily lets us sleep at night and that both my husband and I are home and we are a pretty great team. But we do know that things can change so we are incredibly grateful for this first month. We are so in love with Lily, she is a perfect addition to our little family ♥

Two week checkup

May 20, 2021

Yesterday; Family walk in the park, 27°c outside!
Taking pictures of newborns is not the easiest, but every angle of Lily is cute:)

Hello from the Lily bubble. There is so much to say and yet nothing haha. We are obviously only spending time at home and we don’t do anything other than taking care of our little angel. So, we are busy but are also not really doing anything:)

Lily had her two week checkup appointment with the pediatrician this morning. It’s located across the street from our apartment so it’s very easy for us to get to and we don’t have to interact with anyone else.
She’s had three appointments there so far. The first one was the day after we came home from the hospital. She had a little bit of jaundice then so they took some blood and when the result came in they asked us to come back for another check the next day even though we had an appointment two days later. 

At her first appointment she had already gained above her birth weight which is great. Everything else looked good except the jaundice. For the second appt, Jim went by himself since it was only going to be a blood test but the doctor ended up doing a full checkup and then said that her jaundice looked fine, we don’t need to do anything and we could cancel the appt for the next day.
Today we had her two week checkup. She has gained more weight (she’s heavier than Thor now haha), her skin looks perfect and everything seems great. Since she’s only breastfed we have to start giving her vitamin D drops every day, other than that we are good until the next appointment in two weeks. 

The easiest way to bring Lily to the pediatrics is to carry her in the car seat

I’m so happy that I am able to breastfeed her. My mom and sister struggled and ended up giving formula instead, but I had amazing lactation coaches at the hospital that I can call at any time now as well if I have questions or concerns. To be able to feed her has been a dream of mine and I am so happy that I can. And let me tell you, this little lady can eat. I feel like I don’t do anything else haha. My boobs are clearly doing a great job cause she is gaining weight at a great speed. 

For the most part we have had it pretty easy, Lily is a dream, but I did have a rough day on Tuesday. Lily lets us sleep for 4-6 hours at night, then she eats and falls back to sleep for another two hours, which is awesome, we are so grateful for that! But, I was a bit extra tired on Monday night when trying to put her to sleep and continued to be tired throughout Tuesday and the day ended up being a little bit of a struggle. But, I really can’t complain. One day of a tired mommy out of baby’s 12 days on earth, I think that’s pretty amazing. 

It’s quite warm here in Stamford these days which I of course love! We have been out for a walk with Lily in the stroller every day, I have even been out on my own with her which has been great. Fresh air, moving my body, a calm and sleepy baby and warm weather,.. can’t wish for anything better. I always wanted a spring child and I got one, and she really did bring the spring when she arrived ♥

May 15th, one week postpartum

My dear husband

May 19, 2021

Proud father to our beautiful daughter

Jim,
There are not enough words to describe how amazing he’s been through our pregnancy, the birth of our child and every minute since we came home from the hospital. I didn’t think it was possible to love him more than I already did after our ten years together but those butterflies doesn’t go away, they multiply every day.
Without his loving support I would not have been able to have the perfect birth that I’d wished for. He made me feel stronger than I thought I was, his encouraging words during labor was just what I needed.
I love to see him with our daughter. It’s been amazing to see what a great dad he’s been since the moment she arrived.
And I am so fortunate to have a husband who is working from home, that’s the only good thing about this pandemic I guess. Him working from home allows me to shower, eat, nap, go to the bathroom, clean up our home if I feel like it, play with our dog and take baby for walks every day.
I am beyond grateful to have a husband like Jim ♥ ♥ ♥

Jim gave me a few surprise gifts during our labor day,
one was a chipmunk that stayed with us for good luck (another gift was a singing baby shark hahah)

I’m told that this is how Jim was sleeping as a baby as well. Like father like daughter ♥

baby bubble

May 17, 2021

May 9th, Greenwich Hospital

We are living in a baby bubble. The best bubble there is. So I’m obviously not spending much time on my computer these days. All I want is to care for my family and my own healing. 

Lily is, so far, a dream. She eats, sleeps, pees and reads books. Not much pooping so we are constantly waiting for explosions to happen hahaha. She is just the cutest. Still can’t really believe she’s ours though cause I still don’t really see us in her. Everyone has so far said she mostly looks like me but I don’t see it. However, the first few days, whenever I looked at myself in the mirror I saw her in me. Very strange, like if she had given birth to me. I didn’t actually recognize myself, I just saw her face in mine hahah. 

Thor has been doing so much better than we expected. The first night was tough for us all. He would react to all her noises and we barely got any sleep due to that. But since then he has been accepting more and more. Since like Wednesday, he has been sleeping in bed with us and doesn’t care much when I get up to change and feed her, which is only once the past few nights (J slept with Thor on the couch in the living room the first two nights so that Lily and I could get some sleep). He doesn’t really bark when I’m with her regardless if she cries or not, but he doesn’t seem ok with Jim holding her especially if she cries. But I’m confident that he’ll adjust soon enough.
We try to have him come close to her but he’s not that interested, all her sudden kicks and punches seems to scare him a little. And he is very sleepy, poor thing. We also of course try to play with him, take him for walks like normal and give him love and snuggles throughout the day, but of course Lily comes first these days, nothing we can really do about that. 

And how do I feel? To be honest, I feel great and I did not expect that. Hubby and I talked about it before she was born that he has to check in with me every day and if he notice anything strange he has to help me. Postpartum depression is so very common and I have had some anxiety before in life so I honestly thought it would hit me. It’s only been one week since we came home from the hospital so things can change, but so far I have felt amazing. I think part of it is that I’m fortunate to have my husband working from home which allows me to take showers, eat, sleep, go to the bathroom (which takes forever every time since there’s 4000 steps to take for best healing) and deal with stuff around the apartment. I can not express enough how grateful I am for all that he does for me, Lily and Thor. Jim really is the best husband and father.
Another reason why I think I feel so good is thanks to my yoga practice. All the meditation and breathing techniques has really helped me through both the birth of my daughter and taking care of her since her arrival (I will tell you all about my birth story once I have more time). I am also almost 35 years old and have explored things and worked through stuff in my own life before I added a new one to our world, and I really think that helps. I hope I continue to feel this good. You never know, PPD can hit you at any point up to like a year or something. 

I will post more pictures once there’s time to actually look at the one million photos I have so far haha. Now I have a few things to do before she wakes up for next feeding 😀 Bye.

from chemo to baby

May 14, 2021

Two years ago, on May 14th, I had to go to the ER and get methotrexate for Gestational Trophoblastic Disease due to my HCG numbers not going down after my Partial Molar Pregnancy in January 2019.
Today I’m sitting at home cuddling my sweet baby girl💕
What a journey! And I wouldn’t change a thing. I learned so much from my 18 months of dealing with the toughest thing I’ve ever been through. Everything happens for a reason.
Lily was supposed to arrive 6 days ago, we’ve been waiting for her all along 💖💖💖