Woman

March 8, 2021

I love being a woman, I love my body and the incredible things it has to go through in life, I love the women I have around me that supports me, I love the fantastic women who helped in making changes for us women now, I love myself and every woman on this planet.

To become a parent or to carry my own child has never been obvious to me. I could easily see a future of just me and my husband (and lots of fluffy Thor’s hahah). But here I am, 8 months of transformation waiting for a little one. And this pregnancy journey has been interesting. Nothing of surprise really, but I’ve always been fascinated by the what our bodies can do, that’s one reason for why I became a dance teacher. As women we have a lot of changes happening throughout our lives whether we like it or not. We are born with all the eggs we’ll ever have, we have to bleed year after year, suffer through pms, some women will carry babies and others can’t or don’t want to, we deal with hormones and unexplained emotions and eventually we go through a major change called menopause. And on top of that we have to deal with all the expectations put on us because of that we are women and then we add all the other stuff to the list that men deals with as well. Some women work, others don’t, some women takes care of babies others deals with employees. Women put in a lot of hard work and often don’t get what they deserve in return. But we keep going. Always.

I know nothing about this tiny human inside me (other than it likes to dance all day long just like its mommy), but I know that the more my husband and I can teach her/him about the world the better off she/he is to become someone who will respect others, support others and show love and compassion to others. And that’s all we want. I believe in a bright future for women and men and it starts with us and our little ones. 

Happy International Women’s Day! Lets send a message to the women we care about today and pat ourselves on the shoulder and say “you’re awesome”. Cause women are pretty f*cking awesome!

I am proud of who I am and I love my body

to stay online or not

August 14, 2020

Hi everyone! How’s your summer? Are you back to work/school yet? Are you allowed to go to work/school yet? School hasn’t started here yet I think but it seems like they are getting ready. I wonder how kids will take it. It must feel weird for them to come back to see all their friends and wear masks around them. Or are they used to that by now? 
Anyhow. We are doing just fine over here as always:)

I think about this blog all the time and how I want to write. But then, what should I write about? There are times when I feel like writing every day, and other times there are dry spells that can last for weeks or even months. There’s no shortage of photos that I can share with you haha, but sometimes I just don’t feel drawn to it as much as I like to.

I often think about deleting my social media accounts and this blog and just disappear from the online world all together and not look back.
But I never do it, cause I also enjoy it 🙃
I like to share snippets of my own life, to see what others are up to, get inspired or laugh at a funny dog picture. Social media can be toxic for sure, but it depends on how you use it. For me, I know I have to be careful to use the apps during the end of my monthly cycle when I feel more sensitive towards basically everything. Things that I would normally not care about can cause me negative self talk or even anger towards whatever it is I see or read.
And other times I love opening all the apps and can’t get enough of cute videos of puppies or inspiring dance moves or pictures of friends picnics in the park or their babies or read about an important subject that I can reflect on later.
So, for now, I have my accounts, I have this blog. But who knows, maybe one day I delete it all…

I do share a lot more over on my instagram @fannysura :

 

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brain exhaustion..

June 8, 2020

How are you doing? Like for real, How are you doing today?
I’ve been feeling a little emotionally exhausted myself this weekend. Crisis upon crisis upon crisis. It’s just never ending. And in a way I don’t feel like I’m allowed to share anything online that doesn’t have anything to do with everything going on. It feels like I have the whole world on top of my shoulders and I have to have opinions on everything and it has to be the right opinions, whatever they are. On one hand I want to just shut down and ignore and live in my own little bubble, but then on the other hand I remind myself that I’m part of this crazy world, I too was born to live on this planet and I too have to be involved to make this a better place to be for all of us.
Do you know what I mean? Do you feel like that as well?

I don’t know about you but I’d like this damn pandemic to be over soon. We’ve been quarantined for a few months which I’m sure is hard for everyone, and now we have to deal with protesters that doesn’t keep their social distances and it wouldn’t surprise me if there will be another wave of virus going around after all this. And then I listen to the Swedish press conferences and it makes me angry. They talk like if the problem is  going to be over now when summer arrives and all they ever seem to care about is time. “When can we see our friends and family“? “When can we celebrate graduation“? “Will we be able to celebrate Midsummer“? “When can we travel again“? Time time time, like if they know. They have no control over this, it’s the virus that decides. Stop asking about when, just stay home and when can be sooner. People going to cafe’s and restaurants and taking their kids to playgrounds are basically telling the nurses and doctors to go F themselves,…until they need their help. 

Ok, I’m entering a negative space now and I don’t have the energy for that today. I woke up feeling very happy this morning and I’d like to continue that way. But it’s also so hard to not battle all these feelings and thoughts. I am sad and angry about everything going on, I’m sure a lot of people are. I’m also still trying to deal with my never ending PMP story. But I am also so happy and grateful about so many other things and I’m trying to direct my day towards that. It is ok to be angry, or sad, or have opinions about this or that. But we also need to take a moment to remind ourselves of what’s good. 

This morning I brought my breakfast and a book out to our terrace. A moment to myself. Start the day on a happy note. During this crazy time – 2020, the year we will remember forever – it is important to take time for self care, however that might look like for you. Go for a walk, watch a feel-good movie, enjoy a nice cup of coffee in the sun, meditate, snuggle a puppy or give your body an energized workout. Whatever helps keep you sane 😀 

*

April 2, 2020

Our world will not look the same after all this, whenever “after all this” is. We will not look at the each other the same way, we will not interact with businesses like restaurants and stores the same, we will not spend our money the same, we will be more careful, we will have extra worries and fears and we will not be able to explore the world the same way that we have before. This world shutdown is going to affect us way more than we know. I am scared, I am sad and I am worried.

But it is too big to think of for any of us. I’m trying to keep my thoughts positive and hopeful. Our minds doesn’t need extra negativity and worries at this time, it’s there either way so there’s no need to feed it. 

What I have been reading and hearing the past few days makes me feel all sort of things. What I’m most scared of is of course that anyone that we care about will get the virus and god forbid not make it (please, I beg you, stay at home!). But I’m also afraid that I won’t be able to see everyone again. Everyone is talking about “when this is over” and “when the world is back to normal”, but the thing is, there wont be a normal, not the normal we know at least, and we don’t know when or if this is going to be over. Regarding the virus, yes, they will probably find a vaccine and the pandemic will be over, but that’s not the worst part. People in this world is suffering more than ever now. Lots of people have lost their jobs and probably wont get them back “after this”. Businesses and people will go bankrupt. Countries can go bankrupt. It worries me. 
Since we don’t know what is going to happen, there is no way to know if I will ever be able to travel to my country again, if I will ever be able to see my family again. There is an entire ocean between us and I can’t just go for a swim. 

This is too much and too hard to deal with right now and since I don’t know how the future will look like, there is no need for me to feed my worries. Instead I choose to see the good things in all this, like we can talk to my family and my husbands family over the phone or facetime, my husband and I get to spend more time with each other, we can spread love even if it’s not in person and we can still laugh with people we care about. I am actively choosing to stay hopeful through this. I want there to be happy times “after all this”, I want to see my family, I want to be able to explore other parts of this world, I want to be able to eat at a restaurant again, I want to spend time with friends, I want to take dance classes in studios and I want to see smiles on peoples faces.

I’m not ignoring the horrors in my mind, but I’m trying to keep my thoughts positive and hopeful. 

/ I’m sorry for such sad post today, but I think it is important to talk about the good the bad and the ugly…and these days it’s all of those things. I hope you are staying at home, that you are healthy and I wish you a wonderful day ♥ / 

dance online

March 24, 2020

Isabella Boylston and James Whiteside aka The Cindies
from American Ballet Theater was on Live with Kelly & Ryan this morning

Weird times. The dance world is now online only. Ballet, Modern, kids dance, Yoga and Pilates classes are streaming online both on paid sites and live on instagram. It’s a great opportunity for all of us to stay active and you should check it out.
But now, lets talk about the artists for a second.

Many businesses are struggling right now, some will probably have to close down, many people will lose their jobs and it will be tough during and after all this. Artists like dancers that was already struggling, maybe juggling 3-4 jobs to get around will get hit hard by this.
Being a dancer is tough, always.
Not only do you not get paid for a lot of the work you do – I have been paid in things like promised exposure (they always say this and you never ever get it), bags of chips or checks with discounts for eye wear which you can not pay your rent with – you now also have to compete with everyone on social media. These days, everyone is a dancer, everyone is a yogi, everyone is a photographer etc. The better you are at marketing yourself online the higher paid jobs. It doesn’t matter if you really know what you are doing or not, if you have a large following then companies will pay you to continue and those who have dedicated their entire lives to for example the art of dance who does not have a following or who does not fake it to make it will continue to struggle to pay rent. Sad but true. And now with the coronavirus and everyone staying at home you’d hope that the artists could get space to shine and earn some extra cash through online classes, but…
I have seen so many ‘influencers’ who has posted fitness videos, yoga sequences, pilates workouts, ballet inspired moves at home or danced on tiktok to get their followers to move while at home. Hear me right now, Yes, it is great that they get others to move, but, instead of all these who does not have fitness as their main income should, in my opinion, stay away from offering free fitness videos and instead stick to what they are good at and then mention their personal trainers, yoga teachers, ballet teachers, pilates instructors or the studios they normally take class at, send all their followers to those who actually taught them how to do it and then those people can show how to do things.
Not only do teachers and PTs get to show their hard work and maybe earn some cash (or at least get that exposure so they can have a chance after all this is done), they can also show the proper way of doing things so that everyone doesn’t have to get injured while they are at home, cause unfortunately I have seen way too many influencers and such over the years showing things that isn’t correct or they don’t explain how to do the exercises they are showing and if you are perhaps a teenager who look up to all these fashionistas, funny youtubers and what not, then you believe whatever they say.
* I want to be clear, I have nothing against influencers, youtubers and people working online, they work really hard and are obviously talented in something and have gained a following for whatever they are good at which is awesome. What I’m saying is that if they have a studio they go to and teachers they learn from, they should give a shout-out to them instead of taking the credit themselves. 

This is the time to appreciate the artists. While we stay at home we watch movies, we listen to music, we look at the paintings on our walls, we get inspired by cool images online and we enjoy dance whether it’s on instagram, youtube or in movies and tv-shows or by dancing on our own. In times of crisis, everyone turns to art, always. Please show your favorite artist some extra love. 

I’ve checked out The Cindies Ballet Class in the kitchen a few times, above is screenshot from March 18
They are great, go check them out

I don’t know how it is in other countries, but here in America
they now log in from home to host programs since we are ordered to keep a safe distance from each other.
I read that the police in NYC is now giving out fines if they see any gatherings happening,
parks are open but everyone need to keep a distance of 6 feet apart
(unless of course it’s like husband and wife or parent and kid)