Written February 6, 2019, published in the end of this month
We started this year hoping to have plans for the rest of the year. All goals and plans were based off that one thing – baby Wiggly.
Now we have to think of new goals and make plans for them.
When I was pregnant, I didn’t feel that I wanted to write anything down. I love writing things down but for some reason even writing the word “baby” on a piece of paper didn’t feel right. Maybe I knew.
So now after getting the baby out, I have been sitting down and really been thinking about what I want this spring to look like. It’s exciting to have a blank paper where you can write down exactly whatever comes to mind, but it has also been extremely hard because all it does is to remind me that I’m not waiting for a baby.
One positive thing (cause I think it’s important to acknowledge the good and positive and not only focus on what’s sad and negative) is that now we have a lot more time to figure out where to move, exactly how we want our dream house to look like and what jobs we can have in our new city. We have been talking about this for over a year (or, actually, many years) but been kinda slow to actually execute it. When we got a positive pregnancy test in November, I felt that we were way behind and after our trip to Charleston I felt very stressed and told Jim that maybe it’s best if we just suck it up and live the first year with baby in this place. I was extremely sad about that idea but it just made more sense than to pack up everything and move somewhere due to time pressure.
One reason for why we decided to have a baby now is that Jim has a very good insurance from his job (there were of course many other reasons too). If we move and get new jobs, who knows what insurance, if any, we would get. And now when we know how amazing this hospital is we don’t want to rush leaving. I would be more than happy to (if we would decide to try again) deliver my baby at the Greenwich Hospital. The people working there made me feel very safe and taken care of and that’s probably the nicest hospital I’ve ever been to.
Jim and I haven’t sat down together to talk dreams, goals and plans in details yet, but we have been on the same page since before we got married. We are a very good team♥ So the positive thing with all this is that now we got some fire in our butts to figure out where to end up and how our future can look like. We might never have a baby, but that doesn’t change the ideas we have of living somewhere else.
As for my own goals. Well, the number one thing is to get my body back in shape. I worked out and felt pretty strong during the pregnancy, but I want to focus harder on it now. I think I also want to go back to dancing and that requires a body that can handle it.
Last summer I was writing on a book. I will revisit it and maybe I feel like to continue writing that one. Who knows. Getting a drivers license and a US citizenship is also on my list. Everything else on my list I guess you have to just keep reading this blog or follow my instagram to see when they come true 😉